Leftist commentary from a mouthy bitch
Sometimes a blogger is blessed with far too many things to blog about.
The Marie Claire bullshit: The editors at Marie Claire felt that it was a good idea to let a recovering anorexic blog about the new sitcom “Mike and Molly” and about how absolutely disgusting fat people kissing are. Yes, winnars are them. However, apart from a hearty “Fuck you in the ear, assholes!” I really don’t have anything to say that hasn’t already been said by:
Lesley at Fatshionista, who has been asked to submit a “counterpoint.” As if Maura Kelly had a point other than being hateful in the first place.
Jezebel.com has posted several articles about this since it started, including this one which includes links to several other articles taking Maura Kelly to task. And this one asking who the hell thought this was a good idea. As well as publicizing the Fat Person Kiss-in at the Marie Claire offices scheduled for Saturday October 30th.
And the exceptionally profane response of PuffPastry on Livejournal.
So, after reading everyone else’s responses, I really don’t think that there’s much else I can add without the liberal use of several more expletives and the creative juxtaposition of impossible anatomical positions.
Also, there is the twitter kerfuffle in which Kate Beaton of Hark, A Vagrant fame found herself when she suggested to male fans that complimenting a female comic artist by suggesting you find her worthy of bearing your children is neither cute, funny or complimentary. I’d link, but it plays out over several tweets. You can find her on twitter as @beatonna. Basically, she said that, and then immediately had several guys jump on her for impugning their intentions. In response to their complaints, Gabby from Gabby’s Playhouse created this cartoon.
I really wish that I could say that Gabby’s comic didn’t represent the way discussions of sexism on the net went, but I try very hard not to lie, even to myself. I honestly can’t remember one discussion of sexism I’ve ever had on the net that didn’t attract at least one guy who felt he had to set me right about what sexism really is, and why female superheroines who need to be rescued as often as (if not more than) they rescued others and had boobs the size of their heads wasn’t sexist at all.
Then there’s my burning desire to rant about the fact that I can’t find a fucking bra my size (44C) that doesn’t have those “lightly padded” molded cups to prevent my (GASP! Hide the children!) nipples from showing through my clothes, or minimize my GINORMOUS TITS so I don’t tempt the menfolk with either jiggle or nipple.
A. I do not have ginormous tits, they are a C cup, regardless of how many times the girl at the lingerie store tried to tell me they were D’s. Trust me, they don’t fill up a D cup, I know this intimately. They don’t need minimizing.
B. I am a mammal. As a mammal I have nipples, and I don’t see why I should have to worry about other people being able to see them when WE ALL HAVE THEM! I have been told that some women worry about men staring at their nipples. Yeah, well, I say if men cannot behave like adults when confronted with nipples, SCREW THEM! Or more to the point, don’t.
I fail to see why the inability of Dudes to behave when confronted with boobs means I have go to three or more stores and another five or six websites to find bras that are neither “lightly padded” and molded, minimizers, or just plain fugly.
The reason this actually gets to me, apart from making it impossible to find affordable bras in a reasonable amount of time, is that it is symptomatic of the pervasive attitude in our society that says that men cannot control themselves in the face of secondary sexual characteristics in women. This is exceptionally insulting to men, and they think Feminists hate men. We’re not the ones who think you’re beasts, we think you’re human beings.
I remember a discussion on sexism and gender with a dude where he kept yelling over my voice and denying the studies I cited. That feeling of frustration seems to be part of most dissuasions if sex/race/privilege/etc.
So uh… christ, that bra thing. I have NO bras that fit other than two falling-apart sports bras from Cacique. I’m so very tired of this “if you deviate from the three sizes that are ~normal~ you get nothing but beige if you’re lucky” bullshit. I also shouldn’t have to pay four TIMES as much as the “norm” does for the same fucking garment.
ugh. I’m also tired of, like you said, “the inability of Dudes to behave.” Like, I’m sorry you have fantasy issues, man, but that doesn’t mean I’m gonna dress in a sack. Not my problem.
Not that it makes it any better, but it sucks from the other end of the size spectrum as well. Finding an AA/AAA bra that fits and is comfortable and looks decent is challenging. And I get so cranky at the prices some go for!
Maybe we should start an The Ends Of The Bell Curve Club, with membership targeted to extra-large-cup and extra-small-cup women. Our experiences aren’t identical, but I bet we could all commiserate.
Although it does seem that large-breasted women often get the worst of it. Small-breasted women get told we look like twelve-year-old boys and that we should be careful the men who are attracted to us aren’t closet pedophiles, which is insulting and creepy. Large-breasted women get told that their bodies are inherently trashy and inappropriate if they don’t wear the appropriate “control” or “minimizer” garments and concealing styles, which is so offensive it makes me want to smack somebody on behalf of my mother and every large-breasted woman I know. *grr*
CAn I say, for the record, that the whole “I love you, have my baybiez” comment REALLY pisses me off, as if my only worth is in my ovaries. I think I love Kate Beaton, in a completely Platonic way.
And where do people get off thinking they can define sexism/racism/privilege for the class that’s being discriminated against? Hello?
It’s all back to what my grandma (my dad’s mom) used to say: sure you didn’t intend to hurt anyone’s feelings, but if you did, you apologize. And don’t do it again.
“The reason this actually gets to me, apart from making it impossible to find affordable bras in a reasonable amount of time, is that it is symptomatic of the pervasive attitude in our society that says that men cannot control themselves in the face of secondary sexual characteristics in women. This is exceptionally insulting to men, and they think Feminists hate men. We’re not the ones who think you’re beasts, we think you’re human beings.”
I have nothing to add other than “I love this paragraph!”